Talking Circle For Women
This post is also available in: Spanish
When I was living in Peru, I lived with two other women. One of them is about fifteen years older than me, the other about thirthy years older – so we belonged to three different generations.
I loved being surrounded by this divine, feminine energy. This energy was so soft, so receptive, and yet, so incredibly giving and powerful. The three of us created a safe space in which we allowed ourselves to be vulnerable, to be angry, to cry, to love, to laugh, to live fully, to be together, to be alone, but always connected. There was a place for every emotion felt and we could fully express ourselves. We accepted each other and ourselves, and loved one another deeply. Together we experienced, together we grew.
When I came back to Amsterdam, I started missing this. Many of my female friends had left or were about to leave the country, while most of my male friends were staying. As much as I love my male friends, being with them is not the same as being with women. I missed being surrounded by my sisters and started to think about how I could bring more feminine energy back into my life. I spoke to Eroca about it, one of the women I lived with in Peru. “Why don’t you start a talking circle for women?” she said. With those words she planted a seed, and not too long after that I posted an advertisement in a Facebook group.
The first time, five young women showed up. Some I knew vaguely, others I did not know at all. Nobody really knew each other, and nobody knew what to expect. I explained them that talking circles are deeply rooted in the practices of indigenous people, and that it is a different way of communicating than we are used to. That we were there to express ourselves, to give words to stories we never, or rarely, dared to tell. I also explained them, that this was not a place to give advice, or to reply, but rather to share and to listen from our hearts.
One by one we told our stories. We expressed our deepest fears and our most painful emotions. We cried, sometimes while talking, sometimes while listening. There was laughter too. There was much recognition, but also plenty of difference. This experience showed me how different we all are, how many life stories and diverse ways of dealing with various problems we all can have, but it also showed me how similar we are. How we all have issues and all feel the same emotions. It showed me that by truly listening, our minds and hearts open. We become more welcoming and more loving and connect on a deeper level, from heart to heart. While being in the circle, we all became present in the moment, we felt our emotions unconditionally without trying to change anything. We became one without losing our individuality.
It was incredibly beautiful.